I've been told the truth will set you free. . .here it goes. I went through about nine months where I was drinking to cope with the pain and the memories. I was drinking to forget, to stop the recurring images in my head, to relax enough to try to sleep at night. I quickly discovered that one glass of wine made it a little easier, two would help me forget, three, four, you get the point.
I was self-medicating and the sad truth is that I didn't know another way to get through the days -- and nights. I was confronted with the truth that the life I thought I had was only an illusion. What I finally realized was that "pain waits for you." I would medicate for a day and the next morning all the emotions would come flooding back -- not to mention the massive headache.
Thankfully, I had an amazing support system and they helped me realize that it was time for me to feel my emotions and let the healing begin.
I know Dr. Drew. And Kim, I love ya but, Dr. Drew you are not. I know people who have been in "recovery" for many years. Someone very close to me has been sober for 20 years. One thing I know from talking with him over the years is that persons who are in recovery don't point the finger at others. They focus on their own sobriety. They are there for friends who ask for their help but they don't diagnose and offer treatment plans for others.
When I made the decision not to attend the "nose party," I gave Kim the courtesy of a phone call. I told her the truth about what I was doing and why I wouldn't be coming to her party. I was having fun and yes, I was "tipsy." If I had a nickel for every time Kim "no-showed" for events with no call and then made up some silly excuse as to why she didn't show, I could pay all my attorney fees. Kim and I don't socialize outside the other ladies. She doesn't spend enough time with me to be evaluating anything about my life. I care for her and am deeply happy that she is having success with her sobriety, finally.
Taylor I ready your book and enjoyed it very much. Kim was being more of a friend to you than anyone else. You'll see it eventually but only when you are ready. I had to speak the truth for ya here--because I did read your book and want you and Kennedy to have the good life you deserve, finally.
I hope you stay on the show, we all watched what Kim went threw, and you went threw
something so much more horrible than she did, and I believe you deserve a "Pass"
And you are so right she isn't Dr. Drew she is on meds and I still don't understand
her half the time and she isn't drinking and she still doesn't make sense she is scary.
Bravo keep Taylor she deserves it, you kept Kim it's only far.
Thank you for your honesty in this post. I am happy for you! You have been through so much more then most people could understand, and you keep going strong. You are going to make it and be truly happy, and it will be deserved. Thank you for sharing your world with us. I look forward to seeing what a wonderful life you have been creating for yourself. Please know that there are women all around the nation praying and supporting you.
rflmao Kim nor 'Baby Jane' (aka Kyle) had the right to come to your home and confront you in such a manner. It was a topic that only a 'real friend' would have done without the cameras rolling. Keep your guard up Oklahoma. They've proven to use you and your situation to make themselves seem relevant and to milk air / camera time.
For all you Taylor bashers, SHAME ON YOU! Do you not see what she is going through? Taylor I wish you all the best! Good Luck to you and your beautiful little daughter Kennedy!
Taylor, I don't know if the rumors are true that you won't be a part of the show next season or not. I will say that in my opinion Bravo has made some mistakes this season by having Adrienne as a cast member as well as Kim Richards. I haven't heard anything about whether Kim will be back next season or not but she certainly is one of the most boring out of all the cast members and Bravo needs to let her go. I'm also not sure about Marisa but she is quite boring herself. I would much rather see you next season to follow up with your new love interest and how your doing.
I agree with you. Kim did not do this to unselfishly help you! What a joke! Help comes from people who care unconditionally. Kim is no where ready for the 12th step as now she is battling pill addiction. Good luck and God Bless!
Totally forgot that you were on Watch What Happens Live & once again drunk. Even Andy Cohen stated it & your comment was "that's how I roll". I'm thinking you need AA & very quickly.
You have a long, long way to go, Taylor. You're still making jabs at other people, passing judgments, minimizing your own bad choices and magnifying everyone else's...So emotionally immature! The hypocrisy and double standards are so blatant: You practically beg for compassion (or more likely attention, even if it's negative), but Kim? Who does she think she is? Extending compassion and concern for someone she cares enough to talk to? She needs an MD for that? How well do you KNOW Dr. Drew Pinsky that you DON'T know that people who care WILL call you out? Clearly you haven't progressed much from the taping of this episode.
I urge you to watch the episodes again and see yourself talking behind other people's backs, whispering criticisms into the ears of yet others, "competing" for compassion and claiming reigning title of Queen of Crisis when someone else is struggling and THEN wonder why...you don't feel people are compassionate or care enough: If you can spot it, you(ve) more than probably got it...
@GinaG. They all talk about the others behind their backs, every single one of them. Jabs that Taylor has thrown are no worse than the others. When people pass judgement on people and by the way judgement is your word I dont think thats what Taylor is doing shes stating her opinion and she has every right to do so. Taylor begs for compassion? I've watched these episodes more than once and I dont see her begging for compassion, thats Kim.
Taylor, I adore you....you have the soul like those of us who are strong underneath but, because they were battered emotionally during the growing process, doubt their strength and influence. Honey, you are wise beyond your years because of what you endured, it's just that your fire was quenched by those who were intimidated by your spirit. God allows trials to teach us not to break us. Know that you have a voice and a responsibility. Take time to know what you are being taught.
You need to forgive Russell, girlfriend! And don't you know that the first role model a little girl has is her mother? Poor kid is going to have some issues.
im happy that you are in the place you are! I cannot imagine what you must have gone through. But remember what doesnt kill us makes us stronger is true. It is also true that God will not bring you to it if he wont bring you thru it. I dont know your faith but God is always there for you and kennedy.God Bless!
UGH even in the most serious of situations you feel the need to name drop..."I know Dr. Drew". Good grief!
Taylor, I agree your drinking was even obvious to the viewers as it being over the top, BUT Yolanda deserved some of the tongue lashing she got in your "drunken" Stooper! Yolanda made derogatory and demeaning statements towards you based on what? Not as a friend for sure, because friends do NOT judge each other when we see they are drinking too much, instead out of CONCERN we try to help them (not put them down). Sorry that so many people like Yolanda, but I find her arrogant, intrusive to other people's lives through her judgemental comments and it just looks like she thinks she's above everyone else. I think the Yolanda that I see is the Yolanda you were trying to get to back off of you.....AND you had both the understanding and guts to say something when you'd had too much to drink. Taylor, I think you have GREAT insight, even when you are inebriated! However, do lay off of the liquor (as you said) and you will find even a greater power from within. You have it Taylor, use it.........you are a kind person who can do a world of good (it's too late for Yolanda, she's all about how it all makes HER look in the end).....she's too worried about her appearance. You've shown us a REAL person Taylor and I wish you all the best wishes for the future. You deserve it.
Why do you put the word recovery in quotations... then say "am deeply happy that she is having success with her sobriety, finally." and say other rude digs about Kim. She was just expressing her concern for your well being and you are acting like someone who DOES have a major problem.
Good to see that you are working your way through the pain and confusion of all that you have endured. There is a light at the end of that long dark tunnel and it sounds like you are seeing it. Keep up the good work.
I wish you all the success and happiness the world has to offer. You and Kennedy deserve no less. i know you will do well!!!!
Taylor, I'm liking you much better this year. I would hate for someone like Kim to tell me I had a problem because she is a sick pup and you are right, she doesn't need to be confronting you or anyone about their problems. I'm glad you're in a better place and it takes a big person to apologize. I hope you continue to find happiness and love and many wishes for you and Kennedy to have a bright future ahead of you.
I'd like to see you return for another season. I hope you did not side with Kyle at the reunion. If you did, I think it's goodbye for you. Kim and Kyle have treated you appallingly (as they treat most people) and the viewers are over their particular type of nasty. Whatever happens, good luck. You are changing or the better. Stay away from vile Kyle is is bad for you.
For the life of me I cant understand what's the point of the "zip code" if you can't afford it. If you get a real job and live in the 'burbs with us common folk aren't your (so called) friends still your friends? Won't you still get invites if your address changes? I mean nobody ever seems to donate much except their presence to all these charity benefits they're always at- remember Kyle's soiree? I just raised that at a local benefit from a bunch of poor schmucks lol! .
You sound real silly, u say Kim is no Dr Drew...but was Kim not right. Trying to throw digs at Kim when u know she wasn't in a good place at that time. U are not perfect, nobody is but if u know u was in a negative place and a friend (Kim) comes to u because they recognise certain traits in I then embrace this positive gesture and deal with your demons....so u can then deal with your child.
are you kidding? Kim needs to take lessons from Taylor. Kim is selective in her recovery. Until she is honest, she won't be successful. Hence Paris.
Taylor, anyone who is not empathetic towards you is a complete jerk. Nobody can even begin to imagine the horror that you have had to endure and still do. I am proud of you and I think you are being very strong. I am praying for you and Kennedy, and a happy, healthy future for you both.
I don't think it's right to call people who disagree a complete jerk. People can be sympathetic or empathetic to the situation that happened and what she had to go through while still disapproving of other things she says and does. I do not think there is one person on this blog thinks Taylor deserves what happened to her or anything sick like that. But others have experienced terrible things and it is not your place to judge it in comparison to hers.
Basically, in our hardships we show our strength in how we treat others and act in our times of pain and anguish. I do not believe that Taylor chooses the right way. That is my opinion. This opinion does not make me a jerk just someone who sees it differently than you.
@BlueEyedGirl8703 The best thing Taylor could have done was come back to this show this season.....for her child and for herself...the worst thing she could have done for them both would have been to cave in on herself, which I am sure was tempting after a traumatic event.
Why is not being in the public eye caving in? I think it would've been more healthy for her to step away and be with her daughter, friends, family and away from drama.
You have been such a delight and such a teacher on this show. You have bared your soul and allowed others to see your heart. You have invited others into your sadness to see how a person reacts who has been through what you have experiences. You have also delivered some of the funniest and wittiest lines spoken on this show. At times, you have provided the only light moment we have had on a one-hour show. In short, you are a dear.
To be totally honest, I have to say that I don't agree with your lifestyle (allegedly dating a married man with children), but it is not up to me to judge your life and what you choose to do with it. I simply don't think this situation is one you would want for Kennedy, and if not, why choose it for yourself? Why risk having another man leave her life? Any man who would ask you to share him is selfish -- and highly unreliable, no matter how much you think you love him. It seems to me you're jumping from one bad marriage into a bad relationship, and you haven't thought through the ramifications. Others, on message boards all over the web, are saying the same thing.
I am not alone in hoping that this season won't be goodbye for you and your fans on RHOBH.
If it turns out to be, I know you will land on your feet. I wish you the very best of luck and send a hug to Kennedy. What a beautiful little girl she is!
Even though we do not agree on certain points about Taylor, I thought this post was very sweet. I appreciate your intelligent and thoughtful opinion! :0)
It must be so convient for you to have an excuse you can ply to fit anything you do wrong or regret. I love how you think we forget that you wrote a book trashing your husband about 2 minutes after his death with Kennedy drawing hearts in the book. I see no great transformation from you because you drank to stupor before your tragic incident. I do not deny that it would be hard as heck to deal with but you claim he beat you and was terrible yet you act like it was a perfect marriage. I don't buy it. I am glad you apologized to Yolanda because she didn't deserve it but you trash Kim for wanting to help. Sober or not she was trying to help you. Kyle, the one you defend, clearly just wanted to make more storyline.
I laughed when Kim told Kyle they HAD to confront you and just be prepared for the outburst and crying and denials from you. They were really just trying to get some drama for Kim's dull storyline. And, you fell flat...no reaction they could use for their own agenda. The viewers all knew they both were well aware it was Kyle's fault you didn't know where Kennedy was. No fun being set up, is it?
The irony of Kim, who is probably NOT sober, "intervening" with you was laughable.
That said, take care of yourself. Hopefully you are in a happier place you had a horrendous past year and a half.
I am glad you told the truth. I think it is unfair that the,other girls like badly of you dating other men but don't say anything to Adrienne for her "trashy" behavior with younger men. Kyle is scared to say anything bad about Adrienne because they will lose her families real estate business
Taylor, I understand why you want to maintain the relationship with Kyle. It is for Kennedy's sake. But do be cautious and do realize that Kim and Kyle deliberately embarrassed you in front of the cameras for their evil reasons, not to help you. Let them know at the reunion how wrong that was. Let both of them know what you really think of the way they threw you under the bus at the stupid nose party. The viewers appreciate it when you stand up for yourself. Best wishes to you and your dear little girl!
I cant stand the way you act one way on the show and another in your blogs. On the show you told Yolanda you had no problem with her and apparently lied to her face because now in your blog you can admit the truth. The same thing with Kim confronting you about your drinking problem on the show you were thankful and in your blog you insult her by comparing her to dr drew or lack thereof. And can I point out it was both Kim and Kyle that confronted you but you only put down on Kim for it. Also the nose party, you told Kim you couldnt come because of other plans but in your blog you totally dog her party. You are as fake as your lips, I dont even know which Taylor is the real Taylor, the blog Taylor or the show Taylor. And I am so tired of hearing of all your money problems, dont you have a degree in Biology, its called working and lots of people do it, you should try it. I really hope they dont bring you back next season.
nicoled Oh my I was just about to write the exact same sentiments you did above thank you ..
nicoled And I'm just gonna chime in here and say if you don't have a lot of money, why do you have a nanny?
nicoled You nailed it! It's called being inauthentic and manipulating and addicts think they're masters at it. They also love to pit people against each other, it's their way of convincing themselves they're in "control" when they're stirring stuff or trying to!
These all just classic, typical addiction-disease symptoms. I'm not convinced Taylor is being authentic because, well, look at her! She lacks credibility and talks out of both sides of her mouth.
so happy for you!!! good for you...healing takes a long time and i'm glad you powered through the painful journey!
Hello Taylor ~ Fellow Oklahoman here (Tulsa). My parents are in Vail right now, so I emailed a pic of you to my dad just on the off chance you were there, ha...But, I dont think you are. So, just stopping by to say Hello ~